Tea is fundamental (very necessary) to a bow tied creature. I can’t tell you why exactly, it’s just in our nature. It’s important to sit down with tea and take time to enjoy it. This is true for anything really, so tea drinking is good practice for life.
Sometimes people ask me about the bow tied way and if it’s possible to be more relaxed. So here is some helpful (I hope it’s helpful) advice for accessing your inner bow tied giraffe
Step one, officially declare you are dedicating time to accessing your inner bow tied giraffe – this is a very important step and should not be overlooked. Otherwise, halfway through you may forget what you’re doing and move on to something else, forgetting that you were in fact giving time to your inner bow tied giraffe.
Step two, put the kettle on. I have to get Caroline to help me with this bit as I’m not much keen on handling kettles, so if you need help don’t forget to ask.
Step three, decide what tea you’re going to have. We have lots of teas, all loose leaf – this is important, see question three. Caroline can’t always decide what tea she wants, she has improved but sometimes she still has to ask me. It’s necessary to have a tea that suits your mood. To do this you need to work out what mood you’re in to start with and then pick something to complement or maybe ease it. Sometimes I have an Assam if I want something strong with milk (like after I’ve been out in the rain), and if I want to feel less blue, I have a green tea etc etc.
Step four, get a teapot and find a cup, or more if you’re sharing. My favourite cups have spotty giraffes on them, Caroline had them before she even met me – funny isn’t it! Maybe one day I might have a cup with me on it. We already have my favourite teapot, the one with spots all over it!
Step five, wait for your tea to brew. This is also an important step and ought not to be rushed as it might cause hiccups. This is a time when someone might mistake you for doing nothing and come and ask you to do something, at which you point you need to politely say ‘no, not just now, I’m busy accessing my inner bow tied giraffe, please come and talk to me later’. One ought not to rush tea to brew, it doesn’t like being rushed, who does?
Step six, sit down with your tea, strain it if you like, or leave in leaves if you fancy deciphering (working out) your future with them! Choose from a number of bow tied giraffe musings or meditations to ease your mind. For example: what waistcoat would best suit a gold bow tie? At what point does a cake become a gateaux? How would a sofa surf? Or can a tap tap dance?……………. You will hopefully feel a pleasurable feeling in your brain and your face may move, cheeks rising and mouth widening, your mouth may even open if you laugh, in which case take care not to lose any tea – laughing and drinking tea is a fine art and not as easy as you might think.
To consolidate (make stronger) the session tell someone about your revelations. You may find not everyone relates to your experiences, even if you have just worked out the most amazing pattern for a bow tie made from Lego. But don’t be disheartened, their inner bow tied giraffe may be a bit trapped and may not have been nurtured for some time. If they don’t understand you can always write to me about it.
Note: your inner bow tied giraffe ought to be accessed on a daily basis, ideally several times a day, especially if your outer human is not wearing a bow tie (if you’re not wearing a bow tie other accessories may help – particularly hats and anything around the head). For the best results have a little nibble of something with your tea.